Are you bored yet?

I am lying on my bed; I don't know how long it has been maybe an hour maybe just 10 mins. The ceiling is white, plain, dull, it has no border designs, unlike back at my parents’ house, the one I left. It’s just plane, square with a fan a little left from the centre, probably those who lived before me had their bed right below it. There is a hook in centre, where the fan was actually supposed to be, maybe it was for light bulb, who knows. Things fit in as one wishes, not the other way around. I have watched this countless time and thought same things. The fan is old and has dust settled on it, it hasn't been clean for last few months, nor been used much for last few weeks. There are also some spider webs, but no spider at sight, they left their home too. I hope they reached a good place, maybe they died on the way, or maybe they are alive at some better place than this hobbit's habitat. There is a big crack on the right wall, I have followed its path so many times, it looks ...

  I KILLED SOMEONE trigger warning - blood mentioned, might be anxiety inducing. 'why did you had to do this? ' I scream at her. Holding the body of the person she just...without an ounce of guilt, ripped apart. It's some familiar unknown, taking their last few breathes in my arms, 'please live' the person says to me, ' I want to see you happy' I can feel their helplessness even if I can't recognise their face, in between their long heavy breathes 'promise me?' I try to hold their wound trying to stop all the blood flowing but it isn't helping 'promise?' they ask again 'I do, I do, you won't die either please don't give up' I am crying for them. 'my time is up....' they sound like smiling, and they take a long breathe and go silent, I check their pulse 'no, no, no, this cant be happening' They died in my arms, my hands are soaking their blood and turning me in an uncomfortable shade of maroon. I ...