un-named relations

Hello beautiful souls!!

lets talk about a weird thing we all (i think) have once in life experienced and will experience 

Unnamed relations are like the weirdest thing I have felt in my whole life time yet

They aren’t particularly covered in a label but are like label fluid

They are mostly in between-

Sometimes extreme on one kind label then like in between floating or I say oscillating like waves from one point to other like crest  to trough (I aint that good in physics or anything lol!  But I love to compare irrelevant things) to other and so on…

It’s so confusing and sometimes it’s annoys and fuss your whole inner peace like a full speed train running to a brick wall {here train is thought and confusion of the relation related tension and wall is your heart feelings emotion and peace of mind}

It had… it happens a lot with me (what about u??)

Like,

Do I consider my parents my parents? Is my feeling right for them? (Long story I will detail it all later in another post i guess).

I had (yes had! Girl got some issues and lost half of her friend’s lol!!) A few friends we weren’t friends but not even nemesis……….. We all hung out together... I had great time with them all  but at a point I didn’t felt them as friends like they were just there we all were just a group without trust or any sort of hate or love but sometimes I didn’t liked them or sometimes I felt so good with them. We all certainly didn’t liked each other but we enjoyed our company.

*why am I with them? Do I want to be their friends? Do I need them as friends? Are they right for me? What are we, friends? Acquaintances? Just there to have each other back in fights n stuff?  

To be honest it was a fucking nightmare and a beautiful time together. But at last a big drama happened and we broke I guess for good only.

Then I still have a lot people whom I talk sometimes hang on with but they aren’t anything more important for me but are like a part of my life and memories…

It’s so weird to think that if someone asks who are they to u. what will I answer a class mate? A friend? A person I just know and hangout? Not much important? Like WHATTTTTTTT? It’s like a big spectrum between friends’ and not friends and they all are on different layers or levels!-

Then comes best friends from school

Like idk if they are my best friends or we just know each other more than other people present there… Yeah like I sometimes don’t feel we all are best friends just friends kind of more than friends but not that special bff bond thing but then something’s that happened with us makes me feel yes! Its best friend thing we are best friends and sometimes it’s like idk I can’t label too..

I have now literal 2 friends whom I actually know and can call like my bestfriends (apart from online ones) and are my mates I trust most time

Same happens when I develop little little crush on a person... like I try to talk them as a friend like least talk and then I will make me develop least interest in them idk I just then make that unnamed feeling into nothing

Like seriously idk.. do I really like them? It must be just a bullshit thought? Maybe I’m high (I don’t do drugs for my sake lol) or on hormones? It’s just nothing

Then again there is a person who is my best friend but when we talk sometimes it’s like just “friends’ sometimes it’s like that person loves me sometimes it’s like maybe they are just trying to be with me... maybe I over observe things and make them according to my thoughts but still-

One can’t decide we are friends or bestfriends or more than that... I certainly fell in emotions and felt that’s the one meant for me but guess what I still don’t know … Because yeah it’s not exactly one thing labeled or named. It’s clear it isn’t like lovers or anything near it (we talked about it and I and that person we both denied about having any clear feeling or dating or anything like that) and we aren’t just friends like yeah not friends. Even befriends seems like it’s not appropriate name for what I think this relation between us is Its confusing I have spent so much time trying to think and sort out what all it is..

Do I feel anything for that person or I’m just falling because I have never felt any care earlier? Is it how best friends are actually? Is it just me or same they feel?

what do this in between' things mean??

 And answer is I DON’T KNOW

its like some confused feelings that cant be categorized i think

I guess I’m just trying to see everything too hard or overthinking everything (my super power) or whatever it is

IT’S JUST A NAMELESS LABLELESS THING  and  at one point in life we all get those feelings as I have known people around me... just some notice it (like me) some just never notice or don’t bother to focus whatever but it’s really a messy things doubting your friendship and about people u care

Such things can’t be explained in one word.

It’s a nightmare but it’s just so beautiful dream.

It can break me into sweat and ruin my peace but I can’t let myself out of this confusing loophole-

Idk what can I do!? aughhhhh lol (What will u do if it happens with u?)

I just ignore the feelings and try not to overthink upon it just simple right? Burying thoughts and feelings under a deep dug out ground (imaginary) in brain and covers it with other things.... YES it works!!It helps by the way, neither has it ruined my peace (mostly) nor it becomes any reason to get my good relations with any of them broken cause I care a lot about people I have even if they are my most hated or most cared loved people.

So I guess right now I just got to go in flow and wait for time to make it all clear for me and a bit easy to label them either it is friends or parents

Till then I’m going to survive my life with confusionsssssssss and weirdness

 

Ps-thanks for reading it and sticking with me I would love to know your views on such ‘un-named relations’ whether it’s about friends, parents, bfs, gfs, anyone u know.

see you all kind souls soon <3